An Ode to Shipowner's Liability

It is much to be regretted

That your goods are slightly wetted,

But our lack of liability is plain.

For our latest Bill of Lading

Which is proof against evading

Bears exceptions for sea water, rust and rain.

Also sweat, contamination,

Fire and all depreciation

That we've ever seen or heard of on a ship.

And our due examination

which we made at destination,

Shows your cargo much improved by the trip.

Furthermore the protests show

That the Master blew his nose,

And the hatches were demolished by the gale.

Oh, we'll all stick together

To prove its heavy weather

For we've got the cargo owner by the tail.

So reserving all defences,

Alibis and false pretences,

We suggest that your underwriter man

Is the guy that's out of luck

For we always pass the buck,

Yes we always duck the issue if we can.

'Tis a cause of grief sincere

And we also weep to hear

You are claiming for your cargo wet by rain.

It really is a crime

That you're wasting all your time

For our Bill of Lading clause makes it plain

That from ullage,rust or seepage,

Water, sweat or just plain leakage,

Act of God, restraint of Princes,theft or war,

Loss, damage or detention,

Lockout, strike or circumvention,

Blockade, interdict or loss between 'twixt ship or shore.

Quarantine or heavy weather,

Fog, rain or both together,

We're protected from all these and many more.

Thus its very plain to see

That our liability

As regards your claim is absolutely nil.

So try your underwriter,

He's a friendly sort of blighter

And he's pretty sure to grin and foot the bill.

Wind And Weather

The evening red and morning grey

Are signs of a fine day.

But the evening grey and morning red

Makes the sailor shake his head.

Mackerels sky and mares tails

Make the lofty ships carry low sail.

When the wind shifts against the sun

Trust it not, for back it will run.

When the rain comes before the wind Halyards,

sheet and braces mind.

But when the wind comes before rain,

Soon you may make sail again.